*alarm goes off* Instantly I’m annoyed, my bed is warm and I just don’t want to get up. After wrestling with the idea of me quitting my job and worrying about money later, I begin my morning routine. Let’s pause here: mornings are hard in this house. Like EXTREMELY hard. I’m not a morning person, Sophina moves like molasses in the middle of a Chicago winter. These two don’t mix. On any given day there will be tears. Typically it’s Soph which leads to intense frustration because I am begging a three-year-old for cooperation. *presses play* The other morning after battling about using the bathroom after she got up, I said to myself “If only I could start my day with a glass of wine, coffee isn’t cutting it these days.” Of course, mom guilt set in instantly. Like, what kind of monster am I that I feel like my three yr old is making me want wine at 7:15 a.m?
After my moment of insanity, because I mean that was insane, right? I take a deep breath and just tell Soph, “if you don’t want to go to the bathroom that is completely fine.” I then, go about my business and finish getting myself dressed. WHY do you ask? Because I’m the mom- I know this little girl has to use the bathroom, and in all of her three- year- old going on 21 self-knowledge, she swears she’s doesn’t. That’s cool not picking this battle today; I’m exhausted, the sun is coming up earlier than wanted, my curls in my hair are weird, I’m not sure if I even like what I’m wearing to work today because I feel fat. I have my own problems. I. DON’T. HAVE. TIME. TO. FIGHT. WITH YOU! 2 minutes passed I saw her little body hop off my bed and scurry into her bathroom to do what?!?! Go to the bathroom. Score 1 for Mommy. However, don’t be fooled, I usually lose most of the time. Because toddler. Toddlers are exhausting, and they wear you out.
However, something happens once she gets back from using the bathroom. She is wide awake, and she is agreeable; I’m dressed and figured out to salvage my curls. WIN-WIN. We race out of the house, and I manage to get to work on time, *Praise Sweet BABY JESUS* (We will later talk about how she also attends the school where I teach). The 10-minute car ride to work was great we sang our hearts to “Thunder” by Imagine Dragons. All was right in our world. It dawned on me: the mornings can be a beautiful mess. Mixed with a lot of things, however, we don’t have to let that define our day. I envy that Soph bounces back so quickly. Stuff that happens 5 minutes ago seems like five years ago to her. Maybe my crazy mornings are a lesson in not sweating the small stuff, moving on when it’s time to move on. To find peace and happiness in the little things and letting bad moments just be bad moments, that doesn’t dictate the rest of your day, week or life. It was in that moment that I realized that my morning wine desire, led me to learn a valuable, on-going life lesson from my three-year-old. And this, this my friends, THIS is what motherhood is about. Learning countless lessons from your child, and understanding you as the mother still have so much to learn. Until next time.